Because a librarian always has a back-up plan -- when one resource fails, we always have another: "And this is the best that you c - that the-the government, the U.S. government can come up with? I mean, you-you're NASA for cryin' out loud, you put a man on the moon, you're geniuses! You-you're the guys that think this sh-t up! I'm sure you got a team of men sitting around somewhere right now just thinking sh-t up and somebody backing them up! You're telling me you don't have a backup plan, that these eight boy scouts right here, that is the world's hope, that's what you're telling me?" as Harry Stamper Armageddon (1998)
I have a machine gun, HO HO HO”-- Hans Gruber reading John McClane's joke written in blood across a dead man's chest, Die Hard (1988)
Because librarians do wear sensible shoes (to work, anyway): "Nine million terrorists in the world and I gotta kill one with feet smaller than my sister." as John McClane Die Hard (1988)
Because librarians answer the same questions, day after day after day, with a smile: "Oh man, I can't f---ing believe this. Another basement, another elevator. How can the same sh--t happen to the same guy twice?" as John McClane Die Hard 2 (1990)
Because librarians understand the pure joy derived from helping our patrons solve problems (whether or nor they involve the use of a machine gun): “Yippee ki-yay mother!@#$%&!r” (If you’re looking for instruction as to how to be a good guy, I suggest John McClane as the ultimate mentor. Basic human kindness and wanton destruction are not necessarily mutually exclusive. By studying him, you come to understand that you can do anything, even run through broken glass without shoes, and that a smart-alek attitude will get you everywhere, especially if you’re dispatching terrorists left and right while cursing like a sailor.) as John McClane, Die Hard (1988)
Just this once. ;-)
Video runs a bit long -- but hey, it's Bruce!