Depending on your age, when the phrase "the ides of March" is intoned, you may first associate it with: a) a word that was used widely in the Roman calendar indicating the approximate day that was the middle of the month. The term "ides" was used for the 15th day of the months of March, May, July, and October. The Ides of March was a festive day dedicated to the god of war Mars and was a perfect excuse for a military parade to display the empire's martial might; b) the date on which Julius Caesar was assassinated in 44 B.C. Caesar was stabbed to death (23 times!) in the Roman Senate by a group of conspirators led by Marcus Junius Brutus ("et tu?") and Gaius Cassius Longinus; c) a quote from Shakespeare's play, Julius Caesar, in which Caesar is warned by a soothsayer to "beware the Ides of March;" d) Chicago's own band of favorite sons, The Ides of March, the boys from Berwyn, who scored the chart-topping hit "Vehicle," (I'm your...) in 1970. Singer Jim Peterik went on to lead the band Survivor ("Eye of the Tiger"), but has since reunited with original IOM band members; e) a film starring Ryan Gosling (the librarian's favorite pin-up) and George Clooney (who needs to be a librarian's favorite pin-up; f) the date Rob Blagojevich (disgraced ex-governor of Illinois, convicted of corruption) went to jail (maybe you have to be from Illinois to appreciate this one).
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Same DNA, but born this way... Personally, I am all for cookies in the library...especially freshly-baked chocolate chip cookies...and maybe some nice iced sugar cookies...and why not oatmeal raisin...and snickerdoodles...and peanut butter blossoms?!?!?!? From the clever, slightly cracked folks at XKCD: Here's another one:
It's been a long week... She's short, tan, stupid and... pregnant. Snooki (real name: Nicole Polizzi), the Jersey Shore's tipsy Guidette, has finally spilled the beans: she and her fiance (Jionni LaVelle-- really?) are expecting. Snooki published A Shore Thing last year, the quickest book to ever hit the remainders table at Barnes and Noble. We look forward to her future literary offerings:
What to Drink While Your Expecting Dr. Snooki's Baby and Childcare... the Guido Way Battle Hymn of the Boozer Mom Adults Who Act Like Children... Raising Children Pickles and Perambulators Don't Mix Revenge is one of those fundamental human emotions. As artist Paul Gauguin put it, "Life being what it is, one dreams of revenge." But there's definitely a difference between the revenge fantasies of men and women. Men don't ponder revenge in the same way that women do. For example, guys will often destroy another's property when it comes to revenge. Did Lorena Bobbitt consider keying her husband's car? Probably not. Men might actually think that "living well is the best revenge." For women, revenge is the best revenge. Nathaniel Hawthorne wondered whether "hatred and love be not the same thing at bottom. Each ... supposed a high degree of intimacy and heart-knowledge ... Each leaves the passionate love or the no-less-passionate hater, forlorn and desolate by the withdrawal of his object." Revenge and obsession sleep in the same twin bed, and that's probably why revenge is so often associated with a betrayal of the heart. A love that's river deep and mountain high is going to produce a grief just as deep and high when it's taken away. From the Persuaders to the Pretenders to Annie Lenox, the song remains the same: It's a Thin Line Between Love and Hate. And watch out for the steak knife and the frying pan, dude! Before there was Lisbeth Salander, pierced and tatted Goth-punk princess of ass-kicking revenge (The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo who kicked the hornet's nest while playing with fire), there was Tamora, the Queen of the Goths (literally) and Empress of Rome (by marriage), and the absolute rani of revenge in Shakespeare's bloodiest tragedy (we are talking buckets!), Titus Andronicus. Jessica Lange as Tamora in Julie Taymor's Titus (love the hair!) Tamora, a prisoner of the Roman Army is forced to beg for her life and the life of her oldest son. When Titus, the Roman general, puts him to death anyway, Tamora vows that she will make Titus’ life miserable until her (and his) dying days. And then she proceeds to fulfill that vow. Tam-tam catches a break when she catches the eye of Saturninus, the new emperor (she’s one of those hottie cougars) and she agrees to please in change for power. Of course, Tamora is really into Aaron, a Moor, who is basically up to no good 24-7. I believe the word is amoral. Or is it immoral? Anyhow, they (Aaron and Tamora) are into plotting evil. There’s also some racism on the Romans’ side when Tamora delivers her mixed-race baby. So, given the circumstances, Tamora might be forgiven her desire for madness and mayhem. Anthony Hopkins as Titus Hannibal Lecter Andronicus (also auditioning for Avatar) However, she goes a bridge too far when she turns a blind eye and allows her sons to ravage Lavinia, the virtuous daughter of Titus. Lavinia is the stereotypical"good girl," which during Shakespeare’s era meant she was chaste, obedient, and silent (after being ravaged, her silence is permanent, because the boys cut out her tongue--I told you this was bloody). Plucky Lavinia takes up a stick with her teeth and writes the names of Tamora’s sons in the dirt. Titus, of course, vows to get his own revenge. He tricks the lads into hanging out with him, slits their throats and uses them as the main ingredients of pie that he serves up at a banquet. Manchilds in a tender, flaky crust... You guessed it: Tamora is one of the honored guests. (ShadesofHannibalLecter!!! I’m guessing he served it with a “nice Chianti.”) Titus, totally schizo at this point, kills his own daughter, so that the “shame” of her defilement may die with her. He reveals the secret ingredient of his pie and stabs Tamora, killing her. The whole scene turns into a blood-soaked Rube Goldberg machine: Saturninus stabs Titus, so then Lucius, the last remaining son of Titus, stabs Saturninus, (and they kill two enemies, and they kill two enemies, and so on and so forth... you get the picture) until the stage is littered with bodies. Just goes to show you, as Wolowicz and Koothrappali discovered in "The Gothowitz Deviation" episode of Big Bang Theory: don't mess around with Goth chicks, whether you have tattoo sleeves or not! |
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